Neil Turner's Blog

Blogging about technology and randomness since 2002

More signs that you are a geek

There’s been lots of these ‘top 10 signs that you are a geek’, but here’s a few that a friend forwarded to me that I hadn’t heard before…

  • You greet fellow geeks by saying “SYN!” and they respond with “ACK!”.
  • You think of shopping as a series of SQL statements – select maple_syrup from home_baking_aisle.
  • You still check your mail using pine over an SSH connection.
  • All of the software on your computers is open source. And you compiled it all yourself. And contributed code to at least half of them.
  • You spend Friday nights on IRC, discussing the merits of token networks over ethernet.
  • Your IRC client is called Telnet.
  • All of your t-shirts have geeky slogans such as “There’s no place like 127.0.0.1” on them.
  • You have more Firefox extensions than you have had girlfriends (or boyfriends).
  • You can hold conversations in Perl.
  • You can understand OpenOffice.org’s source code in its entirity.
  • You know what TWAIN stands for. Really.

I know I’m guilty of one of those. How about you people, and do you have any other suggestions?

15 Comments

  1. 2.5. I read my email using pine and ssh where possible, all of the software on my computers is open source (but I didn’t compile or contribute to most of them) and I’ve got more Firefox Extensions than either girlfriends or boyfriends.
    Oh and whilst I’ve never used telnet as my IRC client, I have often used telnet as my mail client.
    Um, I shouldn’t be admitting to all this should I?

  2. Yay! None, and I don’t even understand three of them!

  3. I know what TWAIN stands for. Nothing. It comes from the expression “… never the twain shall meet”. ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. I’m pretty sure I’m a geek but I only qualify on one of the above, though the majority of the software on my home PC is open source. (Windows itself being a notable exception).

  5. TWAIN? This Mark guy, right? ๐Ÿ™‚
    I currently have 57 Firefox extensions. How could I even catch up with girlfriends? …uh, let’s try…must run…

  6. I know you can hold conversations in Perl, so how many girlfriends have you got?

  7. use LWP::Simple;
    use Person::Ciaran qw(:blogResponses);
    sub myResponse {
    my $content = get(“http://www.neilturner.me.uk/2006/Apr/12/more_signs_that_you_are_a.html”);
    my $ciaran = new Person::Ciaran;
    my @itemlist = $ciaran->parseBlogEntry($content);
    foreach $item (@itemlist) {
    if ($item eq
    ‘You greet fellow geeks by saying โ€œSYN!โ€ and they respond with โ€œACK!โ€.’
    )
    { $ciaran->respond($respNotSure); # from the :blogResponses import
    $ciaran->say(
    “No-one says that to me, but if they did, I would.”
    ); }
    if ($item eq
    “You think of shopping as a series of SQL statements – select maple_syrup from home_baking_aisle.”
    )
    { $ciaran->respond($respNo);
    $ciaran->say(
    “But then again, I don’t go shopping much. ;-)”
    ); }
    if ($item eq
    “You still check your mail using pine over an SSH connection.”
    )
    { $ciaran->respond($respNo);
    $ciaran->say(
    “But how about mutt? ๐Ÿ˜‰ Okay, so I don’t actually do that. I use SquirrelMail and Evolution.”
    ); }
    if ($item eq
    “All of the software on your computers is open source. And you compiled it all yourself. And contributed code to at least half of them.”
    )
    { $ciaran->respond($respSortOf);
    $ciaran->say(
    “Most of it is open-source. Most of that open-source stuff was compiled by me (via Gentoo’s portage system). I can’t claim to have contributed code to half of them though, sorry. ;)”
    ); }
    if ($item eq
    “You spend Friday nights on IRC, discussing the merits of token networks over ethernet.”
    )
    { $ciaran->respond($respNo);
    $ciaran->say(
    “Besides, it’s a dead issue. Everyone uses Ethernet nowadays.”
    ); }
    if ($item eq
    “Your IRC client is called Telnet.”
    )
    { $ciaran->respond($respNo);
    $ciaran->say(
    “But I have used telnet as my client before for a laugh. And like lordrich, I’ve used telnet to read mail sometimes, and send it.”
    ); }
    if ($item eq
    “All of your t-shirts have geeky slogans such as โ€œThereโ€™s no place like 127.0.0.1โ€ on them.”
    )
    { $ciaran->respond($respNo);
    $ciaran->say(
    “But I’ve wanted to get some T-shirts from ThinkGeek for a while.”
    ); }
    if ($item eq
    “You have more Firefox extensions than you have had girlfriends (or boyfriends).”
    )
    { $ciaran->respond($respYes);
    $ciaran->say(
    “The computer I’m currently on has 13 Firefox extensions, including the standard two for Talkback and the DOM Inspector. My home computer probably has roughly the same.”
    ); }
    if ($item eq
    “You can hold conversations in Perl.”
    )
    { $ciaran->respond($respNotSure);
    $ciaran->say(
    “Are you saying this isn’t everybody’s normal method of communication?”
    ); }
    if ($item eq
    “You can understand OpenOffice.orgโ€™s source code in its entirity.”
    )
    { $ciaran->correctSpelling(“entirity”, “entirety”);
    $ciaran->respond($respNotSure);
    $ciaran->say(
    “I haven’t looked.”
    ); }
    if ($item eq
    “You know what TWAIN stands for. Really.”
    )
    { $ciaran->respond($respNo);
    $ciaran->say(
    “I knew it, but I had forgotten it. Shame on me.”
    ); }
    }
    my $total = $ciaran->totalResponses({ $respYes => 1,
    $respNotSure => 0.5,
    $respSortOf => 0.5,
    $respNo => 0}); # comes to a total of 3.
    return $total;
    }
    print “Looks like I got ” . &myResponse() . ” or so.”;

  8. about 2.5 here – there should be another one that says you met your wife on irc ๐Ÿ™‚
    I’ve telnetted into irc when desperate to chat and it was very painful.
    Firefox extensions was pretty easy one to get too.
    I used to know what TWAIN meant – now I don’t care – its just another scanner thing – however an interesting answer is “toolkit without an interesting name” but apparently it doesn’t stand for anything (see http://www.cnet.com/Resources/Info/Glossary/Terms/twain.html) but it could also be a singer…..
    The only time everything is open source is when i boot with a livecd

  9. *giggles* Sorry, Neil, for forcing you to put scroll bars on comments. ๐Ÿ˜‰ I didn’t mean to mess up your template. Honest. ๐Ÿ˜€

  10. You put too much salt in the carrots and reach for the Undo button.

  11. “East is East, and West is West, and never the twain shall meet…” – Rudyard Kipling, The Ballad Of East And West.
    TWAIN is not an acronym even though it does look like one since it is written in uppercase. “Technology Without An Interesting Name” is a backronym.

  12. Backronym?

  13. > *Backronym* – A backronym or bacronym is a type of acronym that is constructed to match the letters of an actual word appropriate in some fashion to the topic at hand. The word “backronym” is a portmanteau of back and acronym and was coined in 1983. [Wikipedia]
    There’s also a big list of them here.